Do you know why people leave their jobs? The number 1 reason according to research by Forbes Magazine is toxic workplace culture. Nobody wants to go to work and be surrounded by and/ or experience toxic behaviours. It is horrible. ‘Bro culture’ can make up a significant part of toxic workplaces - and its impact on women at work can be pretty devastating.
In this blog post, I discuss ‘bro culture’ - what it is, why it is harmful and what you can do to combat it. Keep reading to learn:
What exactly is bro culture & where does it happen
How bro culture manifests in everyday working life
How bro culture impacts women, working mums & others
How you can deal with bro culture
Are you looking for help with your professional challenges as a working mum? Get in touch today for a no-obligation discovery chat.
My experience of ‘bro culture’
Before I start, let me say I’ve been there. And, in my work supporting women in fast-growing businesses, ‘bro culture’ is a particular culture I hear mentioned, especially within Tech.
I have to be honest. When I first came across this term, I had to google what it was. But when I started reading more about it, I knew exactly what was being talked about here. And, I could relate to my own experiences of ‘bro culture’ working in sales.
It’s a big problem, especially for working parents (mums, especially) - so I’m big on helping other women navigate it, solve it and push through.
Is bro culture real?
Very much so. Despite being used for entertainment value in films such as Wolf of Wall Street or the entertainment show, Billions, it is very much a real problematic workplace culture that is seen every day. It’s nothing new - and has been around for a while.
What exactly is bro culture?
Bro culture can be summarised by the term ‘work hard, play hard’ and represents a large population of often young, generally white, hyper-competitive males in the workplace.
It can play out day to day with ‘bros’ operating in an environment of extremes - extreme behaviour (often negative or aggressive), extreme partying, and extreme reactions - all creating an environment of gossip, competitiveness and toxic chatter.
And this was my experience of it. Although I didn't identify it as such at the time, now I reflect it was present. Those bros were always wanting to be at the top of the tree no matter what. Often wanting to be validated by a top bro - where power and privilege reigned, and speedy growth was rewarded.
Delivering quick, fast results no matter what. This is what bros value for themselves and for others. If you have to be overly aggressive, rude or cutthroat to get those results, then that is what you do. And you will be celebrated for doing so. And so, in 'bro culture', the focus shifts to valuing the end result rather than how you go about it. Have you been a good, decent, respectful person in achieving that? Probably not. But that’s not the focus in bro culture.
Where does bro culture occur?
Bro culture is particularly common in certain industries where diversity is lacking and where women are unfortunately underrepresented, such as in the tech sector.
Marginalising women, and anyone else who doesn’t ‘fit’
I do just want to flag that a lot of men don't subscribe to these values and behaviours. In fact, in my experience, men may also feel marginalised in these environments.
You’d think that because bro culture is such an obvious problem that’s been around for so long, it would be solved - or have a better protocol to deal with it. So, I am often surprised by how often this culture crops up in my work as a coach. Bro culture is unfortunately still in existence today - and affects countless professional working women in the workplace.
Imagine being a working mum in a workplace where bro culture thrives…
Or perhaps you don’t have to imagine, because it is you.
You already stand out as being different to the majority. You want to prove your value in being there in the first place, that you have what it takes to achieve fast results. Yes, you’re a mum - but that doesn’t affect your professional ability, you think.
You try to be present in a long hours culture, without letting on that you were up all night with a sleep-regressing baby and buying birthday presents on Amazon for little Rex from nursery’s birthday party at 12 am, as it was the only time in the day you could do it.
You can see my point! These worlds don't naturally blend well. Feelings of isolation, alienation, and burnout often emerge for many women. Some feel that their tolerance of ‘bro culture’ has diminished post-parenthood. This workplace isn’t for you anymore, you think.
3 ways to deal with bro culture
1. Get support internally and externally
There is no easy answer to this question. However, talking about your experiences and feelings with trusted peers and colleagues to raise awareness and highlight the issue is important. You need to make sense of anything that bothers you in this toxic environment. Exploring how you are feeling is the first step to creating a plan of action that’s right for you.
2. Seek out a professional coach
How about speaking with a coach? Often independent from your company, a coach is a safe space to work through what bro culture issues you’re experiencing and get an outsider’s perspective.
Have someone by your side. Speak to me about my coaching for professional women.
3. Say no, it’s powerful
It might also be finding the courage to push back. Say ‘no’ to things that
make you feel uncomfortable
make you feel less than
make you feel small within this culture
don’t support your values as a person
are not authentically you.
For example, if you are in a meeting and you are asked to take notes because you are the only woman in the room, politely decline. ‘No’ doesn’t have to be rude or disruptive in the workplace - ‘no’ is powerful, clear and communicative - helping you move on and your colleagues understand your position.
What’s more, I guarantee this will bring focus to the issue. And if one person does it, it inspires others to do the same, and a collective has big power in making change.
Working mums are incredible
You offer so much. You are skilled, professional and an important asset to a company. But ‘bro culture’ can impede that. Remember, you are awesome - you have got this. There are things you can do to tackle this toxic workplace culture.
Are you a working mum in this environment?
Or are you a woman who has simply had enough of toxic masculinity in the workplace?
I'd love to chat about how FutureYou Business Coaching can help you with your workplace challenges - and help you move forward so you can feel positive, happy, inspired and confident in your working life. Get in touch today.
Comments