You might not know this about me, but in December 2020, I walked away from my secure, corporate job and took a giant leap of faith. Yep, on the 3rd of January 2021, I sat in front of my laptop and thought, ‘right, I am going to be a coach and trainer and set up my own business’. Oh, and I also had a 14-month-old baby at the time too! It required incredible self-confidence - and I had to overcome vast self-doubt to reach that point.
So today, I am writing this blog post to help you - if you're wanting to harness more confidence in your work, career, business or life. I want to share my self-doubt to self-confidence journey - and give you practical ways to feel better about yourself and improve your self-esteem. Keep reading to learn:
All about my self-confidence journey (Does it sound familiar? Can you relate?)
How I tackled my inner gremlin (inner critic!)
Why your inner cheerleader is so important
9 practical tips to improve your confidence today
My self-confidence journey: you CAN do it, Suzy!
I look back now and think, wow, that was a bit crazy! Some may even say stupid! But as I reflect, I also ask myself why didn't I do this sooner? I knew I had wanted to pivot my career from sales into coaching for years. I knew coaching would make me much happier and more fulfilled in my working life. What's more, I was committed. I had gone back to university in 2017 to start studying for a degree in coaching and mentoring! It was surely clear to myself what I wanted to do. So, why had I waited to do it?
Tackling my inner gremlin
The answer to that is I had held myself back. It was me. Specifically my fear of failure, my self-doubt, and my lack of self-confidence that I could make this transition a success. But yet, I used to daydream for hours when I was out walking or on holiday, what my life could look like if I did it. Every time, I stopped myself and told myself that it all sounded very nice and interesting, but I wasn't worthy of experiencing it. That familiar voice in my head would tell me, ‘you could never do that’, ‘ you aren't good enough,’ and I listened. So I didn't do it.
Tune out your inner critic and tune into your inner cheerleader
And I hear this pattern of holding ourselves back a lot in my work supporting women 1 to 1. Listening far too much to that inner critic rather than that inner cheerleader.
I can hear you asking, inner cheerleader? I like to think of the voices we hear in our heads as two characters who sit on our shoulders.
On one side, there is your inner gremlin, the little voice that tells you, you aren't good enough, you don't have the experience, that you aren't going to succeed. It plants that seed of self-doubt and lets it grow, often consuming your thoughts.
On the other shoulder? Our inner cheerleader. The one that builds our self-belief and champions our self-esteem. You can do it! And you will do it!
Sometimes the inner gremlin and the inner cheerleader battle it out, like a game of tug of war to see who can have the strongest voice in my head. Does this sound like something you've experienced? Most of us do! And many of us let that pesky inner critic win. But once we release the true power of our inner cheerleader, that gremlin fades into the background. Trust me! I've been there.
You're not alone in your self-doubt
Many of us, especially women, suffer from a lack of self-confidence and doubt. According to new research published by think tank The WealthiHer Network 79% of women surveyed admitted they struggled in this area.
We can sometimes forget that self-confidence is something that takes time to build and that the ability to develop or cultivate it, is not linear. So how do you turn your self-confidence around and make your inner cheerleader the strongest voice you listen to? You start today with small practical changes - that will, in the long term, have a big impact.
Here are 8 ways to improve your self-confidence:
Identify the areas where you feel confident and those where you don't. This can help you focus on what you need to work on
Celebrate your achievements, no matter how small. This will reinforce the feeling of self-worth.
Practice speaking positively to yourself. Rather than focusing on your weaknesses, focus on your strengths, and remind yourself of all the things you can do and the things you like about yourself. Try to replace any negative thought patterns with more positive ones.
Don't be so hard on yourself if you don't reach your goals right away. Celebrate small victories, and give yourself credit for your efforts. Learning to be kind and compassionate with yourself is an important part of building your self-confidence.
Don't compare yourself to other people. Everyone has different skills and abilities, so comparing yourself to others won't help build your confidence.
Spend time with friends, family and colleagues who support and encourage you. Surrounding yourself with positive people will help you to feel more confident.
Keep a journal and write down your successes and achievements. This will help remind you how far you have come and boost your self-confidence.
Set yourself manageable goals and focus on achieving them. This will help you feel more in control of your life, and boost your self-confidence. Take small steps to push yourself out of your comfort zone and gain more confidence in yourself.
Keep calm and practice self-confidence
The biggest takeaway here is that tackling low self-confidence is something that takes practice. There's no magic solution to self-doubt, but with the right mindset - and support - it is possible for anyone to become more confident. Start by taking the time to practice these tips, and you will be well on your way to becoming a more confident person, banishing that self-doubt and that pesky inner critic. Good luck!
Are you a woman struggling with self-confidence?
And it's impacting your work, career and overall happiness?
I'd love to chat about how you can overcome a crisis of confidence. I will help you feel seen, feel supported and feel good about your work - with me as your professional cheerleader. Get in touch today.
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